Blog #1 - Skin Cancer

Freckle Face RAW!   

I’ve been feeling a pull since last summer to share my raw self more often.

Me showing my face without any makeup, filters etc makes me feel super anxious because to me....this is ugly.  I’m not looking for compliments or attention, I just want to share in case anyone else can relate.

Have you ever noticed my forehead scar and wondered what caused it?  Today I am sharing my skin cancer story.   So here goes...

First I will start by warning that the next photo is graphic.  The scar I am pointing to is from skin cancer that I had removed.  It was Morpheaform Basel Cell Carcinoma which is the least common type of Basel Cell Carcinoma.   I’m no expert in skin cancer but I do know that Basil Cell is the most common kind and tends to be from sun damage.  It’s quite treatable.  Usually it just needs to be removed.  Once you have it you usually need to keep an eye on your skin and see a dermatologist regularly.  Of course there are other types of skin cancer.  One of the scariest is Melanoma and that is because of it is not caught in time it can spread deeper into the skin or other parts of the body.

Four years ago I had the cancer on my forehead removed.  I had what looked like a chicken pox scar that appeared on my forehead.  I just dismissed it and assumed it was maybe from a pimple that I didn’t remember.   This scar grew in size and I think it was about 6 months that I realized it had doubled in size. 
I called my dermatologist who I see annually because skin cancer runs in my family.  The doctor said he wanted to biopsy it and that he thought it was a type of basil cell.  Sure enough it was skin cancer.  I was booked for a day surgery to have it removed.  Fine...no biggie....I’ll have a couple of stitches and it will heal.  We had a family wedding to attend that weekend.  Well to my surprise the surgery was more invasive than I had been prepared for.  I ended up with a bunch of stitches and the surgeon informed me that almost any surgery on your forehead will result in black eyes which mine certainly did.  Swollen, sore and disfigured (that’s how I felt), I told David that I absolutely could not go to the wedding that weekend.

I had assumed it would be a small bandaid so I had wayyyy underestimates the healing and had not estimated AT ALL the emotional pain.  I’ve always struggled with Body dysmorphia so for me my dysmorphia became so much worse. I wasn’t at all mentally prepared, I sank into a depression.  I’ve struggled my entire life with depression and anxiety (it’s a daily struggle for me as i know it is for many).  Anyway, after several weeks of healing and hiding at home, I was able to pull up my big girl parties and get back to life.  I’m still insecure about the scar but nothing like I was. 

Sooo this summer please use sunscreen and do you best to avoid sunburns.   The other bonus of sunscreen.....less wrinkles down the road!  Have a fabulous weekend!